As an avid watcher of B type movies, especially B horror films I was initially excited to watch Frozen. I then checked out the trailer and became pumped to sit down and watch this movie as soon as possible. Its unfortunate that within the first ten minutes of the movie I realized exactly what I had gotten myself into. The movie centers around three main characters, Parker O’Neil (Emma Bell), Joe Lynch (Shawn Ashmore), and Dan walker (Kevin Zegers). With most, if not all, the second rate movies I watch the actors and actresses are relatively unkown to me. Fortunately I was watching this movie with Alex and he thought the actor playing Joe Lynch looked familiar and a quick IMDB search, it showed that he was in X2 as the young Iceman.
Anyway, this movie is very similar to Open Water and Open Water 2:Adrift. The only difference is that one is in warm shark infested waters, the other is in a sub zero ski chair lift, with a wolf pack of the non Hangover kind. I’d like to say more than that about the movie but that’s really all there is to it.
Well that’s a lie, there are so many terrible aspects of this movie that it makes the main characters seems as though they have a combined IQ of 100. That may be a little harsh but let me throw a couple of quick scenarios at you. You’ve cheated your way onto the mountain to begin with to save money, but that’s not enough for you, you have to go on one night ski run as well. The absolute last ski run on that mountain for the next week. Okay, so maybe that’s not so bad, but when all of a sudden the operator of the ski lift on that last run changes three different times in a matter of 15 seconds after the trio’s chair lift headed off towards the top you begin to think, “really that just happened, what a convenient coincidence.”
The next scenario really just sums up how predictable and un realistic this movie truly was. The three main characters get stuck halfway up the mountain in the chairlift because the mountain gets closed. The three main characters saw other skiers on their way up pass underneath them. Now if you’ve even been skiing you’ll know that the operators of the ski lift at the top of the mountain ride back down the mountain in the chair lift or they ski down the mountain. Either way, the operator should have run into the trio sitting in the chairlift at some point right? Well magically he is down at the bottom of the mountain ready to go home without having passed the three main characters. So that’s not terribly unrealistic maybe he took another way down the mountain. But still that’s just another convenient coincidence. Before I go any further I want to say that there have been tons of movies I’ve seen with un realistic downright stupid plot points but this movie takes the cake in having too many making the entire movie only interesting to watch in the fact that I had never seen so much ridiculousness outright un realistic plot points in a single movie before.
Back to my little rant review. So you’re stuck in a chair lift in sub degree weather, of course you might think you to jump down, but then you’d realize its 50 feet below to compacted icy snow that would obviously break your entire body upon impact. You’d start thinking of alternatives, such as the fact that about 100 feet away is one of the towers through which the ski lift uses to string together all the chairs. Yes its hard to scale a steel wire 100 or so feet to the tower, but it makes more sense than jumping and absolutely breaking something. Right? Wrong, one of the main characters decides its best to jump anyway. Fine at that point I wanted something to happen. What do you know legs break and he’s stuck and can’t move, thus jumping was pointless, well other than to break both his legs. Now pay attention this is where things get really interesting. A wolf pack shows up. I’m going to let that register for a moment. A wolf pack, yes, an entire pack of wolves shows up in the middle of a ski path to eat the guy with the broken legs, while the remaining two characters can do nothing. Ridiculous.
I realize this is getting long so I’m going to end it with one more wonderful plot point. One of the remaining characters eventually makes it down to the ground un-scathed but as I later found out had also was eaten by the same pack of wolves halfway down the mountain while he was attempting to reach help.
It may seem like I’ve spoiled the entire movie, but believe me I’ve left out numerous other crazy plot issues. Even with the ones I’ve shared this movie is only worth watching to see that I’m not crazy and that the only think you can do while watching this movie is say “really, that just happened?”
Check out the trailer below, but beware!
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