Set to sail into theaters this weekend is the upcoming sci-fi and effects heavy action flick, Battleship, a film which is very loosely based off of the popular Hasbro board game of the same name. The film is directed by Peter Berg (Hancock) and features a fun and good looking, but rather ineffective cast comprised of Brooklyn Decker, Taylor Kitsch, Alexander Skarsdarg, Rihanna, John Tui, Liam Neeson and Tadanobu Asano (he was my favorite in the film).
When Earth sends a message to space in hopes of finding life, instead of getting a message back, a small fleet of ships crashes down into the Pacific Ocean off the coast of Hawaii during an international Naval war game. When the generally irresponsible naval weapons officer Lt. Alex Hopper (Kitsch) ventures out to see what crashed, a giant force field erupts and some powerful alien ships emerge from the wreckage trapping three ships inside, including a Japanese ship, and preventing the rest of the military fleet from helping their comrades. It’s up to Hopper, Cpt. Yugi Nagata (Asano) and their mates on the ship along with a few civilians on land to work together in order to take down this extraterrestrial and technologically superior foe.
Going in with low expectations is the way to see this movie. I for one thought it was hilarious that they were marketing it with the line “from the same company that brought you Transformers” because this is a movie that may be on par with Transformers 2, just not offensive. The action and effects are actually amazing and, in that regard, it will remind you of Transformers in a positive light. The battles are badass, the aliens are pretty cool and every scene that doesn’t involve talking makes for pure and unabashed cinematic eye candy, especially when the shredders roar onto the screen. It’s a perfect film to see in a theater especially if you want to hear loud noises and see shit blow up! There were also some great rock tracks and a typical sci-fi-ish score backing the film up. I do have to give props to Berg for creating some shots that made you feel like you were actually playing the board game; even it is against an alien race.
That being said, I couldn’t get over all the other side plots and terrible dialogue that plagued the feature. I found it hard to believe that this film was written by Jon and Eric Hoeber, the same duo that penned the really witty film Red. It truly was laughable and there were so many moments or scenes that were set up in awful ways that made me howl with laughter. Peter Berg, how did you not realize this when you were making the film? Did it all sound and look good when it was happening in person? Without AC/DC playing in the background, I can’t imagine it did.
Now I know there are some people out there, includin
g me, who are excited about Liam Neeson being in the film, but I will let you know now that while he’s entertaining when he’s on screen, he only has about three minutes worth of actual screen time. What I’m saying is don’t expect him to be a big part of the film. There is another group of people out there who are curious as to how Rihanna fares in her big screen debut. She’s fine. She comes off as an average supporting cast member who tries to be tough and funny and occasionally pulls it off, but I think that has more to do with her personal attitude than anything.
Battleship is the perfect example of an action film without any substance. If you look at the action alone, Peter Berg has made a visual spectacle that’s intense and really fun, but once you factor the story, acting and dialogue into the mix, the entire dynamic of the film changes and everything that’s exciting about it gets tarnished. I’m still not sure who thought it would be a good idea to base this film off of a board game as the film could have done without the co-branding and nothing would have changed, but it just goes to show that studios are willing to green light anything today if it has even the slightest sense of nostalgia.
Rating: Intense, visually awesome, and action packed but its dialogue will cripple it like a torpedo (5/10)
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